12-4-11

Monday: Today was a great day. We got to enjoy the morning in the
house, cleaning and relaxing. Then we went to get lunch. We had
completos. YES! We then wentto use Internet to write the family. Daddy
said they all enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving. but he also said it
was kind of lame because it was just the four of them. They want me
home. I think they`re "trunkier" than I am. Haha. I got an email
from...Joe! He is currently in Orlando, Florida. What the heck?! I
hope he`s doing well. loved hearing form him. We did exchanges at
night. I went with Elder Maldonado. We tried to contact a member who`d
said she had a referral for us. But she wasn`t home. So we pretty much
just did contacts all night. But then I had the idea to share the "17
Miracles" movie with the Diaz family. They were totally down for it.
It really was a beautiful movie. We were all feeling the Spirit so
strongly. Then they gave us some refreshments. Yum.

Tuesday: Today was great. We actually got picked up on time, this
week, to go to our Distrizona in Cañete. The Zone Leaders are sking us
to get reports on all of our Districts investigators and their
activities. In our district Meting, I said something insensitive to
Elder Brady. As soon as I made the remark, he got quiet, closed his
eyes, and started shaking. I was just thinking, "Oh crap. I`m an
idiot." He turned around and went to the bakc of the room and refused
to participate. I went over and stood by him, and rubbed his back. He
was crying. He said he learns things by touch, and that doesn`t wrk
with languages. I`m such a jerk. He accepted my apologywe hugged and
cried and stuff. We did contacts in the afternoon. We got into 3
houses. One in particular, Estéfani, was really great. She`s young,
about 23 or 24, and has a 4 year-old daughter. I noticed how her eyes
shone when she spoke of her daughter. So we decided to teach about
Eternal families. She said we could come back tomorrow. We`ll see how
that goes. My whole run-down with Elder Brady has let me know just how
far I have togo before I can get marrand have kids and relationships
in general. Dang it! But I guess it`s normal to mak mistakes
sometimes. As for making upfor hose mistakes, I think I`m doing
alright.

Wednesday: Today was wonderful. It was kind of funny in the morning,
though. I was so excited to study. We ran, I showered, got dressed,
got all my books out, and then the other MIssionaries told us we had
to do service. We did that for a few hours before we got back. I was
just sitting down to study en the Branch res. called and asked us to
come by, to pick up the Permaneced list. We got back and I read
twoverses before my comp. reminded me of an appt. we had in 15 min.
DANG IT!!! We couldn`t even find the guy. We took out money beto
lunch. After lunch, we met with Camilo, the kid who went to church on
Sunday. We waited in the Chapel, and I was pleasantsed when he
arrived. We taught the Restoration. He`s been through a lot of
churches, looking for truth. he wants to do what`s right. When I told
of the First Vision I felt the Spirit so strongly. I was oing to
explain tHAuthority, but I lt impressed to ask how he felt. He said,
j"I feel a calmness I`ve never felt before." This message is so
powerful. "It doesn`t depend on the Message, but the messenger," as
Boyd K. Packer said. He wants to read and pray about the Book of
Mormon. He also said he wants to be baptized. WOOT! But he belongs to
the oher missionaries. We did contacts until night. Then, the Ward
Mission Leader invited us o his son`s b-ay party. It was great.

Thursday: So this is the last entry in my 398-page journal. WHAT?!
what the crazy sauce is that all about? ;) We got up and, after doing
the usual, we did our Weekly Planning session. The only problem: we
don`t have any investigators, after our week or so of being here in
Curanilahue. I now that we should be measuring our success by how e`re
doing with ourselves, rather than base it off of the decisions others
make. But not seeing any success...well, it gets discouraging
sometimes. We DID have a delicious BBQ fo lunch. It was smoked meat,
full of flavor and not cartilage. I ate as muchI could. All of our
appts. with "future Investigators" fell through. Another day full of
contacts. We fond a lady that wanted to listen to us, but just that.
She "has faith in her own church." When I asked her why, she said
"because it`s closest." She was so hard-hearted, and I just wanted to
help. I was very grateful for the respite from the sun, thanks to
cloud cover, as well as for the good night`s sleep ahead of me.

Friday: So we wer up all night, the four of us. Elder Smith, Elder
Maldonado, Elder Brady and I. It turns out that we all have food
poisoning and we spe the night vomiting together. It`s really weird.
All four ofus. Weird. Before the Mission, I`d never met what I like to
call a "vocal vomiter." I have now met a few. It`s someone that yells
at the top of their luns until they become reaquainted with their
previous meal. Let me tell you, it`s enough to turn anyone`s gut. We
cancelled our lunch today, because even though our mouths wanted food,
the rest of us couldn`t take it. I tried to study in the morning, but
I had an enormous headache that prevented me. Eventually, it went away
and since, out of the four of us, Elder Maldonado and I were feeling
the best, we wenti some people and get the laundry. The people weren`t
there, and the laundry wasn`t ready. We came home and slept. Later,
the two of us went to try and teach Camilo about baptism, but he never
arrived at the Chapel. ile we were there, Elder maldonado started
asking me what I thought of him. He said he`d been h aving a lot of
introspective doubts lately. He asked questions about my family and
what I missed most. He`s got one tmore than me. I can tell that he
misses his family a lot. I bet he`s looing forward to his Christmas
phone call. Camilo never showed up, so we headed back to thepartment.
As the evening has progressed, the others` symptoms have improved,
whmine have progressively worsened. My stomach is cramping, my head
aches, and I`m dizzy,creating nausea. Ooph! But it`s nice to be in
this together. It creates kind of a comraderie between us. it`s sweet.

Saturday: So today was part 2 of the "food poisoning doosies." but on
the bright side, even though I didn`t feel well enough to go too far
away from the toilet, I WAS able to study. I was finishing up Alma 42
and read some advice that Alma the Younger gives to his son. There`s a
part where he tells his son not to excuse his sin in the slightest
degree. He says this is so he can be humbled down, to the dust. I was
pondering on how that oculd work, and I realized that if we were
always making excuses for ourselves, we would never feel guilty. And
if we never felt guilty for our actions, we would never feel the need
to repent of those things we`re doing badly. heavenly Father really
can`t excuse us...at all. When I learned this, I realized just how
much I sometimes make bad chioices or mess up because I give myself
excuses, or crutches to go off of. But I`m not going to do that
anymore. I think it`ll help me in my endeavor with Alan, of getting to
be the best people we can be. We didn`t cancel lunch today, `cause we
just HAD to get out of the house. While we were waiting for lunch to
be ready, we shared stories of how we got our various scars. Or
rather, everyone else did. I didn`t have any cool ones. I`ve kind of
made it a point to avoid dangerou/stupid situations and, as a result,
have lived a relatively dulll life. Hah! We were also talking (in
English) about where we`d be calling our families for Christmas. Then,
the Brother walked in and invited us. Sweet! I spent the Afternoon
napping. I woke up several times with chills and sweating. I`m feeling
better, though. We`re gonna work our butts off tomorrow, to try and
make up for some of the stuff we haven`t haveen able to do. I`m tired
right now.

Sunday:Today was fast and Testimony meeting. It was really great. We
got to our Priesthood meeting and Hno. Neira asked why we hadn`t gone
to the Executive Comitee meeting, asking if we had slelpt in. I hate
how the people in this Branch assume the worst about the Missionaries
based on how the last ones behaved. First ofall, that meeting is
invitation-only, so they have to invite us, which they didn`t do. And
second ofall, I was totally up at 6:30, getting ready. Judging and
prejudice suck. We had a really great class about Brotherhood. The
teacher turned the word into a cool acronymthat doesn`t work in
English. Sunday School was about Exaltation. The testimonies were
great, as always. We had lunch with Hna. Nidia, who washes our clothes
for us. She toldus about what it was like, to be a mom of missionary
sons. She said that when both of them came back home they were
different...and she didn`t like the changes. What kind of jmother says
that about her own sons? What kind of changes deserve that reaction?
Almost all of my journal entries have been dedicated to self-analysis
and discovery. I`ve definitely come a long way in self-confidence. But
what will those changes be viewed as, by otheres? 2 years is a long
time. What will I think of THEM? It`ll certainly be interesting. I
couldn`t sleep most of last night. In the time I had to think I
thought of the time I have left to me as a Missionary. There`s so much
more I can do and learn. But it`s not very long until I get to see my
family again. I still remember my first shock as I realized that I was
leaving them. Scary and intimidating as heck. And soon, after all the
waiting and missing, I`ll be back with them again. What will that be
like?