8-16-10

PICTURE DESCRIPTIONS:
the first one is me peeling an orange that had more peel than orange.
the second one is a cute little dog that reminded me of a sea lion
the third one is-yes...a tiger in the window
the fourth one...I lost my name tag for a few hours, and we had to make a replacement. this was a mistake.




Tuesday: We woke up this morning to go to our distrizona meeting. It was pretty good. We were complimented on our numbers but were urged on to be better. Elder Girllone will be gone next tuesday. At his house! I wonder what it will feel like. Right now, if I were offered an honorable return, for whatever reason, it would be strange. I`m not sure if I would refuse, or even have the strength to reject the opportunity. But there is no doubt in my mind that I would regret it forever afterwards. LeGrand Richards mentioned an interview with a national radio commentator where the DJ was asked, " If there was a message more important than any other, what would it be?" He replied, " If a man died,k and came back to life, what he would have to say would be the most important." When Moroni came to Joseph Smith, he gave us that message! I`m preaching it right now! But packing up my bags would be bittersweet for sure. I`m not saying I would complain about being in a clean country again. But all these people would be left without a knowledge of their plight or how they can escape it. It seems like success is so difficult at times. People are so stuck in their ways, and the catholic church is even teaching eternal marriages now! How are people to accept our message, if they`re already practicing the same things? Even if they don`t have the authority. They THINK they`ve got it right, but they won`t find out they`re wrong, until it`s too late! So I`m working as hard as I can to be the best teach I can, so I can help them feel the spirit thorugh me. I feel like the sons of mosiah who shook when they thought of the fate of others. I want to help! I`m here! We spent the evening and the afternoon doing contacts and buyikng supplies to repair the shoes of the other elders. Then elder barajas and I went to FHE with Teresa. It was a lot of fun. I got to play with the little babies. They loved me. I even did some little magic tricks for 4-year old luis. 2-year old Jose loved taking pictures (with flash) with me. We visited Robin and Bilha to finish off the night. Robin had had his Aaronic priesthood interview, and was worthy. MAXIMUM PWNAGE!!



Wednesday:We got up today, and got ready for the day while listening to DAvid Archuleta`s Christmas album. I thought of Devin. We did contacts in the bosque sector until we had lunch with Hna. Veronica. As a surprise, we did not have bean and noodle soup. It was rice and potato. It was very rich, and she even threw in some homegrown cilantro. Yum. We came back, and planned to plan and ready permanaced, but we both just died on the couch. We were soooo exhausted. We got out on time, though, because we had eaten so quickly. We did contacts and permanaced until we visited Hna. Ema. Her family`s doing very well. Sandra has definitely stopped investigating. Poop. (funny word) We went and visited the millahual family. Osvaldo got expelled for treating his pe and english teachers badly. He didn`t seem to feel bad at all. (We found out two days later, that he has a mental condition.) We finished off the night by visiting Robin and Bilha. I can finally understand Bilha (But not Robin) and talked with her a lot tonight. She smiled at me and politely said, "you`re, like, weird." I beamed at her, convinced that she had finally understood me too. I`m a bit of a weirdie. Everybody says I am, but in a good way. What if I want to sweep someone off their feet? what if I want to be study, instead of nerdy? No girl is gonna want someone...strange. This is also something I realized tonight. I think I`m afraid of women Not in the "Awkward RM" way. But as much as I want to be loved and accepted, I have no idea how to behave around them (although maybe I just forgot), and I especially am terrified of kissing. Out of the 90+ missionaries I`ve met, I`ve only met one other Elder who has yet to be kissed, and he`s fat and pompous. Gosh dang it! I`m going to do whatever I can to let some girl know that I`ll do anything for her that no one else will. But kissing and everything else makes me shake in my boots. So I make do with filling my days with things of the Gospel. One scripture is really cool for my situation. in 1 corinthians 13:11- When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; But when I became a man, I put away childish things. Maybe that`ll be me someday.

Thursday: We woke up, and peeled and sliced potatoes to eat during our planning session. We listened to audio scriptures while we worked. It was really nice and relaxing. we had lunch with Hna. Anlli. Her son was watching power rangers. I`ve never seen it before. It looks pretty dumb and repetetive. after that, we conquered contacts like nobody`s business. Then we picked up FÇernanda, and made some french fries for our meeting. I spoke with Elder Rodriguez about my newfound fear of love. He told me to practice with an orange juice bottle. I said no, and likened myself unto the bottle. No matter much I want the juice within, I don`t know how to remove the lid. Even though I want to love someone with all my heart, I don`t know how to express myself. I`m scared because when I get back, all of the girls will have already had their first kisses,k and they`ll meet me, and I`ll be horrible at it and mess up, and they will find someone who actually knows what they`re doing. I just realized that these past two entries are really doubting and sad. As much fear as I have about the future, my life right now is great. I have friends here that care for me. My family`s alright. And my friends at home are all cheering me on. I find myself thinking of the families here, and the things that they`re going through. I think that the more I forget about home, the better I`ll feel. I had a thought tonight, about my low self-esteem. Everyone on the mission thinks very highly of me. All of my bad thoughts are from bad past experiences. When the earth will be made perfect, the people living there will not remember the old earth, nor will it enter their minds. That`s when it was sactified of God. I`m serving god right now! I`m being changed. After my mission, I won`t think of the bad, past times, but of all the happy memories of my mission. The lord is leterally helping me physically because of my decision to serve. So, with that in mind, I move forward in faith, trusting my live in his hands. What else CAN I do?

Friday: We got this morning, only to discover Elder rodriguez had loaned his dumbells to Elder Hawker, so I was stuck with stinkin` push ups. They always make me feel embarassed. We startede out the day with a visit to Teresa. We discussed teaching her lessons of the commandments, like the word of wisdom. But as soon as we got there, we went on a completely different tangent. I think I`ll take the blame though. I just felt like she really needede to hear about the family. We talked about many things, but most notable was temple work. I talked about grammy, and how she`s been married to a muslim for 40+ years, and he`s not converted. I can seal them when they die! Teresa has the opportunity now! Also, we spent out ftudy time reading "the trilogy of scousen". A talk (our copy was in spanish) about the structure of the univers, where spirits come from if they have no beginning or end, what it means to be a father in heaven. Crazy! The universe is made of things to be acted upon and things to act on them. All things have the ability to have intelligences put in them. Every thing here is made up of intelligences and primal material. It says we`re just earth with millions of intelligences. When our intelligences leave, we`ll turn back into earth. D&C 88:37 says that wherever there`s space, there`s a kingdom, and vice versa. The space, or kingdom, is God`s workspace. What`s outside of his space? Outer Darkness. Outer darkness has no space. It`s a giant pool of intelligences that our Spirits were formed. Our intelligences chose what form they would take: earth, anoimal, or human. We all return to God after life. The sons of perdition and the devil will fight after the millenium to avoid outer darkness. Because if they get disorganized and thrown back into the pool of intelligences, they can`t be chosen by other heavenly fathers in a different round of creation. Every Heavenly Father will have 3 monumental crises. 1st a revolution during the creation of the spirits,k 2nd the redeemer of the others will fail because of fear 3rd the final battle with satan. It will intensify because of the realization that SAtan and his followers will be dispersonalized and disorganized. He knows he`ll lose. We will have the power to command intelligences (like when moses got to turn his staff into a snake, his arm had leprosy, or he turned water to blood, water from the rock). Every Heavenly father needs to have their own redeemer. Ours was called Jehova. It`s amazing to be able to learn all these things. I actually have a headache from all these things and Spanish. ugh.

Saturday: We got up, and headed off to the Stake center for our weekly soccer match. I scared a lot of goals today, and was able to maneuver the ball skillfully so that people would pass me the ball more often. It was so much fun! We left and showered before hustling off to the chapel for a baptism of the sister missionari9es. We wouldn`t have been able to arrive on time if it hadn`t been for the bishop driving by us in his taxi car, and giving us a ride. The ceremony went smoothly, and I got to sing "I like to look for rainbows" with the sisters. The last time I sang that song at a baptism was of Aunt Anita`s, when I was 4 or 5. It was cool. We drained the font, and headed off to lunch. We had mac & cheese-flavored broth, followed by meat and potatoes. For dessert, we had ice cream! Chocolate, coconut, and butterscotch! It was so good! Afterwards, we came back and read & studied until our haircut appointment. I got my 3rd haircut of the mission today. We also found out about our next transfer, including our new companion. I was worrying all day, because I don`t want to lose Elder Barajhas yet. Well we`re both going to stay here together! Yay! We visited the Millahual`s tonight. It was a very important night. Papá Joel is the only one not baptized in the family. I saw the pain that it was causing his family. MY (chilean) family. I told him of my fear I had for them. That even though they`re married and happy, if they`re not married by the proper authority, they`ll be separated and be servants to those who are sealed. They`ll be SEPARATED! D&C 130-132 says all this. I taught with authority and confronted him, and told him that he was hurting his family. I felt impressed to turn to Mamá Maite and ask her what she would give to be married and sealed to Joél forever. She said, "My life." I was moved to tears as I heard her devotion to him. I turned to him and said firmly, "Did you hear that? She would give her LIFE for you. You have a responsibility to your family to provide for them spiritually." I was very scared to confront this man, bu tI said it. I also asked about baptism. He said he didn`t want a 2nd baptism. We taught him about it, and he went from getting baptized "some day", to "soon". Fernanda said I was very brave to talk to her dad like that, and that she was so thankful. She said I was the first missionary to confront him like that. They`ve had missionaries through their house for 3 years. Elder Barajas said he knew why President had assigned me here. He had it this way, changed it, and felt he needed to change it back. Elder Barajas said I had to help Joel.

Sunday:We got up today, and were going to call teresa, but we`re out of minutes! And as we were literally heading out the door, poor Robin called, saying he needed help tying his tie. So we headed off to help him with his dilemma and sacrificed any chance we had had of reaching Teresa`s in time. I sat with the Millahual`s. Mamà told me hat after we left, their home was very truanquil and calm. Papá Joel cried a little bit. She said I need to keep it up. I don`t know about that. Elder Barajas knows more scriptures, and can make him see the importance of things like correct priesthood authority. Robin received the aaronic priesthood today. He and Bilha were so happy. We walked them home in the cold wind. I loved seeing Robin carrhing his daughter, Maria paz, on his shoulders. He`s a good man. I find it interesting what bilha said. She told us that this past week, people have been offereing him tea and coffee. And he said no! He did it so he could be worthy to bless his family. He`s a stud. For lunch we ate with a family of the other ward. The dad makes great wood works. we`re gonna buy wood symbols of our mission. It normally costs $30, but he likes us so much, it`ll only be $26! He`s making the other elders pay full price, because Elder Rodriguez talks too much. Haha! For lunch (you`re going to hate me for this), we had rice and horse meat! It was pretty dang good, and is cheaper than beef! Maybe I`ll have more sometime? :) We came home, and planned ourt our evening before leaving to get laundry. The sister hadn`t done it yet, so We`ll go tomorrow. The rest of the night was just family visits. Nothing too exciting.

On Mon, Aug 16, 2010 at 1:56 PM, Brigham Merrell <bmerrell@myldsmail.net> wrote:
Your letters definitely help, but it takes forever to write back. I have 4 minutes left, but my comp isn`t done yet, so I`ll try and squeeze this in.
i have always been afraid of BIG spiders. I squish little ones with my bare hands. I had songs in my head that sung about girls, hence, it didn`t help me forget them. haha. Kayla and I didn`t have a song, but I associated "must have done something right" by relient k with her. I still think it`s cool that you play the piano so skillfully. I honestly didn`t know that before you told me in the letter. haha. sorry. I`m a horrible friend. :) I feel bad for tosha. But that`s gonna happen when we`re all married. It happened with my teacher in the mtc. I don`t know.... you might get too busy to write me. haha. but if you say so, then I will trust you. haha. I don`t know how you and Kayla felt. Because it feels like it didn`t even start before it ended. Something happened, but I`m not sure what it was. sorry. I can`t wait to hear about your academic adventures (<---alliteration)

Monday: This day was pretty much musing about you. No, it wasn`t creepy. Just thinking.

Tuesday: We woke up this morning to go to our distrizona meeting. It was pretty good. We were complimented on our numbers but were urged on to be better. Elder Girllone will be gone next tuesday. At his house! I wonder what it will feel like. Right now, if I were offered an honorable return, for whatever reason, it would be strange. I`m not sure if I would refuse, or even have the strength to reject the opportunity. But there is no doubt in my mind that I would regret it forever afterwards. LeGrand Richards mentioned an interview with a national radio commentator where the DJ was asked, " If there was a message more important than any other, what would it be?" He replied, " If a man died,k and came back to life, what he would have to say would be the most important." When Moroni came to Joseph Smith, he gave us that message! I`m preaching it right now! But packing up my bags would be bittersweet for sure. I`m not saying I would complain about being in a clean country again. But all these people would be left without a knowledge of their plight or how they can escape it. It seems like success is so difficult at times. People are so stuck in their ways, and the catholic church is even teaching eternal marriages now! How are people to accept our message, if they`re already practicing the same things? Even if they don`t have the authority. They THINK they`ve got it right, but they won`t find out they`re wrong, until it`s too late! So I`m working as hard as I can to be the best teach I can, so I can help them feel the spirit thorugh me. I feel like the sons of mosiah who shook when they thought of the fate of others. I want to help! I`m here! We spent the evening and the afternoon doing contacts and buyikng supplies to repair the shoes of the other elders. Then elder barajas and I went to FHE with Teresa. It was a lot of fun. I got to play with the little babies. They loved me. I even did some little magic tricks for 4-year old luis. 2-year old Jose loved taking pictures (with flash) with me. We visited Robin and Bilha to finish off the night. Robin had had his Aaronic priesthood interview, and was worthy. MAXIMUM PWNAGE!!

Wednesday:We got up today, and got ready for the day while listening to DAvid Archuleta`s Christmas album. I thought of Devin. We did contacts in the bosque sector until we had lunch with Hna. Veronica. As a surprise, we did not have bean and noodle soup. It was rice and potato. It was very rich, and she even threw in some homegrown cilantro. Yum. We came back, and planned to plan and ready permanaced, but we both just died on the couch. We were soooo exhausted. We got out on time, though, because we had eaten so quickly. We did contacts and permanaced until we visited Hna. Ema. Her family`s doing very well. Sandra has definitely stopped investigating. Poop. (funny word) We went and visited the millahual family. Osvaldo got expelled for treating his pe and english teachers badly. He didn`t seem to feel bad at all. (We found out two days later, that he has a mental condition.) We finished off the night by visiting Robin and Bilha. I can finally understand Bilha (But not Robin) and talked with her a lot tonight. She smiled at me and politely said, "you`re, like, weird." I beamed at her, convinced that she had finally understood me too. I`m a bit of a weirdie. Everybody says I am, but in a good way. What if I want to sweep someone off their feet? what if I want to be study, instead of nerdy? No girl is gonna want someone...strange. This is also something I realized tonight. I think I`m afraid of women Not in the "Awkward RM" way. But as much as I want to be loved and accepted, I have no idea how to behave around them (although maybe I just forgot), and I especially am terrified of kissing. Out of the 90+ missionaries I`ve met, I`ve only met one other Elder who has yet to be kissed, and he`s fat and pompous. Gosh dang it! I`m going to do whatever I can to let some girl know that I`ll do anything for her that no one else will. But kissing and everything else makes me shake in my boots. So I make do with filling my days with things of the Gospel. One scripture is really cool for my situation. in 1 corinthians 13:11- When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; But when I became a man, I put away childish things. Maybe that`ll be me someday.

Thursday: We woke up, and peeled and sliced potatoes to eat during our planning session. We listened to audio scriptures while we worked. It was really nice and relaxing. we had lunch with Hna. Anlli. Her son was watching power rangers. I`ve never seen it before. It looks pretty dumb and repetetive. after that, we conquered contacts like nobody`s business. Then we picked up FÇernanda, and made some french fries for our meeting. I spoke with Elder Rodriguez about my newfound fear of love. He told me to practice with an orange juice bottle. I said no, and likened myself unto the bottle. No matter much I want the juice within, I don`t know how to remove the lid. Even though I want to love someone with all my heart, I don`t know how to express myself. I`m scared because when I get back, all of the girls will have already had their first kisses,k and they`ll meet me, and I`ll be horrible at it and mess up, and they will find someone who actually knows what they`re doing. I just realized that these past two entries are really doubting and sad. As much fear as I have about the future, my life right now is great. I have friends here that care for me. My family`s alright. And my friends at home are all cheering me on. I find myself thinking of the families here, and the things that they`re going through. I think that the more I forget about home, the better I`ll feel. I had a thought tonight, about my low self-esteem. Everyone on the mission thinks very highly of me. All of my bad thoughts are from bad past experiences. When the earth will be made perfect, the people living there will not remember the old earth, nor will it enter their minds. That`s when it was sactified of God. I`m serving god right now! I`m being changed. After my mission, I won`t think of the bad, past times, but of all the happy memories of my mission. The lord is leterally helping me physically because of my decision to serve. So, with that in mind, I move forward in faith, trusting my live in his hands. What else CAN I do?

Friday: We got this morning, only to discover Elder rodriguez had loaned his dumbells to Elder Hawker, so I was stuck with stinkin` push ups. They always make me feel embarassed. We startede out the day with a visit to Teresa. We discussed teaching her lessons of the commandments, like the word of wisdom. But as soon as we got there, we went on a completely different tangent. I think I`ll take the blame though. I just felt like she really needede to hear about the family. We talked about many things, but most notable was temple work. I talked about grammy, and how she`s been married to a muslim for 40+ years, and he`s not converted. I can seal them when they die! Teresa has the opportunity now! Also, we spent out ftudy time reading "the trilogy of scousen". A talk (our copy was in spanish) about the structure of the univers, where spirits come from if they have no beginning or end, what it means to be a father in heaven. Crazy! The universe is made of things to be acted upon and things to act on them. All things have the ability to have intelligences put in them. Every thing here is made up of intelligences and primal material. It says we`re just earth with millions of intelligences. When our intelligences leave, we`ll turn back into earth. D&C 88:37 says that wherever there`s space, there`s a kingdom, and vice versa. The space, or kingdom, is God`s workspace. What`s outside of his space? Outer Darkness. Outer darkness has no space. It`s a giant pool of intelligences that our Spirits were formed. Our intelligences chose what form they would take: earth, anoimal, or human. We all return to God after life. The sons of perdition and the devil will fight after the millenium to avoid outer darkness. Because if they get disorganized and thrown back into the pool of intelligences, they can`t be chosen by other heavenly fathers in a different round of creation. Every Heavenly Father will have 3 monumental crises. 1st a revolution during the creation of the spirits,k 2nd the redeemer of the others will fail because of fear 3rd the final battle with satan. It will intensify because of the realization that SAtan and his followers will be dispersonalized and disorganized. He knows he`ll lose. We will have the power to command intelligences (like when moses got to turn his staff into a snake, his arm had leprosy, or he turned water to blood, water from the rock). Every Heavenly father needs to have their own redeemer. Ours was called Jehova. It`s amazing to be able to learn all these things. I actually have a headache from all these things and Spanish. ugh.

Saturday: We got up, and headed off to the Stake center for our weekly soccer match. I scared a lot of goals today, and was able to maneuver the ball skillfully so that people would pass me the ball more often. It was so much fun! We left and showered before hustling off to the chapel for a baptism of the sister missionari9es. We wouldn`t have been able to arrive on time if it hadn`t been for the bishop driving by us in his taxi car, and giving us a ride. The ceremony went smoothly, and I got to sing "I like to look for rainbows" with the sisters. The last time I sang that song at a baptism was of Aunt Anita`s, when I was 4 or 5. It was cool. We drained the font, and headed off to lunch. We had mac & cheese-flavored broth, followed by meat and potatoes. For dessert, we had ice cream! Chocolate, coconut, and butterscotch! It was so good! Afterwards, we came back and read & studied until our haircut appointment. I got my 3rd haircut of the mission today. We also found out about our next transfer, including our new companion. I was worrying all day, because I don`t want to lose Elder Barajhas yet. Well we`re both going to stay here together! Yay! We visited the Millahual`s tonight. It was a very important night. Papá Joel is the only one not baptized in the family. I saw the pain that it was causing his family. MY (chilean) family. I told him of my fear I had for them. That even though they`re married and happy, if they`re not married by the proper authority, they`ll be separated and be servants to those who are sealed. They`ll be SEPARATED! D&C 130-132 says all this. I taught with authority and confronted him, and told him that he was hurting his family. I felt impressed to turn to Mamá Maite and ask her what she would give to be married and sealed to Joél forever. She said, "My life." I was moved to tears as I heard her devotion to him. I turned to him and said firmly, "Did you hear that? She would give her LIFE for you. You have a responsibility to your family to provide for them spiritually." I was very scared to confront this man, bu tI said it. I also asked about baptism. He said he didn`t want a 2nd baptism. We taught him about it, and he went from getting baptized "some day", to "soon". Fernanda said I was very brave to talk to her dad like that, and that she was so thankful. She said I was the first missionary to confront him like that. They`ve had missionaries through their house for 3 years. Elder Barajas said he knew why President had assigned me here. He had it this way, changed it, and felt he needed to change it back. Elder Barajas said I had to help Joel.

Sunday:We got up today, and were going to call teresa, but we`re out of minutes! And as we were literally heading out the door, poor Robin called, saying he needed help tying his tie. So we headed off to help him with his dilemma and sacrificed any chance we had had of reaching Teresa`s in time. I sat with the Millahual`s. Mamà told me hat after we left, their home was very truanquil and calm. Papá Joel cried a little bit. She said I need to keep it up. I don`t know about that. Elder Barajas knows more scriptures, and can make him see the importance of things like correct priesthood authority. Robin received the aaronic priesthood today. He and Bilha were so happy. We walked them home in the cold wind. I loved seeing Robin carrhing his daughter, Maria paz, on his shoulders. He`s a good man. I find it interesting what bilha said. She told us that this past week, people have been offering him tea and coffee. And he said no! He did it so he could be worthy to bless his family. He`s a stud. For lunch we ate with a family of the other ward. The dad makes great wood works. we`re gonna buy wood symbols of our mission. It normally costs $30, but he likes us so much, it`ll only be $26! He`s making the other elders pay full price, because Elder Rodriguez talks too much. Haha! For lunch (you`re going to hate me for this), we had rice and horse meat! It was pretty dang good, and is cheaper than beef! Maybe I`ll have more sometime? :) We came home, and planned ourt our evening before leaving to get laundry. The sister hadn`t done it yet, so We`ll go tomorrow. The rest of the night was just family visits. Nothing too exciting.